I sent my hubsand an email. hopefully He'll see it this morning. Because I tell him that I'm going to be awake for breakfast and that my phone has been cut off. I wanted to email him earlier. but my internet wasn't working. I wish I had messaged him about the whole breakfast thing earlier. Honestly I was not expecting them to cut the line off so early. Because they had told me that I would have till saturday, so I try to send my husband a message and didn't it go through, there was no sending, it was message failed, and then my phone conversation with my mom just lasted less then a minute and when I tried calling again, I got, "You have exceeded your credit limit." I don't even understand how I have a credit limit, when I use a post paid plan.

908

When the channels on the satilate box went out, I started changing the frequencie's using the numbers that were already there. and for a while nothing worked. for a while I could only get nilesat to work, and then that wouldn't even work, and I was starting to lose patience with it, because I had lost patience with it on Thursday and had thrown the remote control----its fixed now, and I never want to break it again. And then, finally, it went back to the orginal frequency that I had put. Because it wouldn't go to any of the frequency's listed. I seriously don't understand that. So now, I can only watch the mbc group, and mtv, and one tv on one channel, because I don't get nilesat anymore, apperantly, because that is where the doubles of the channels that I watch. Anyway, it's not a big deal, the point is at least I get those channels, and I practically fixed the problem myself. This morning, I had a dream that had a daughter, I knew it was my daughter in the dream, because this guy, in the next car, goes, "She gave birth to a blonde haired girl." I have no idea how my daughter is going to have blonde hair? But I guess stranger things have happened, anyway, I think there are people in my family that have blonde hair. Anyway, I thought it was interesting that she was the spitting image of my sister. I look very similar to one of my aunts and one of my cousins, so it kind of makes sense that in my dream my daughter looked exactly like my sister. My dream daughter that is. Anyway, it probably doesn't mean anything, but whatever. I am watching Blind date on fox series, next is master chef australia. But its going to be a boring epsisode, my favorite epsiodes are the ones that they have the mystery box. Those episodes are the most interesting episodes. Although I don't find the likes of tonights episode interesting I am still going to watch it. Last night I went to bed at two in the morning, and then, I woke up at six in the morning.

I hate that I am missing the biggest loser, and all my other shows, such as Top Chef, Master Chef Australia, The doctors, Doctor Oz, my turkish series that I follow-----not my personal series. Good movies that are probably showcasing on MBC Max, Top Gear------only because they're comical, in a smart way. I like smart funny people. I hate how I am probably going to miss all of my shows, I got into watching this week. Who knows when I'll get the reciever fixed. Probably not in a very long time. I am downloading some updates for my computer, so that I can play my dvds. I want to get a dvd player. I really wanted to take a shower today, but on account that there's no running water I can't do that. I also hate that I'm missing the british version of Paris Hilton's new best friend. And that I'll be missing I used to be fat. Now how am I supposed to be inspired to lose weight or workout? This would all be good and fine, if my Ipod worked, but my ipod is dead.

Oh my god, the drama----of Paris hilton's BFF, the British version. It seems like everyday, someone is against someone, there is always drama going on. This week, the drama is between Emma and Cat.

Honest

To be honest, Steve Jobs death, didn't sadden me at all. I don't mean to be mean or anything, but I've got to be honest. I mean sure it is a sad thing, that the world has lost a creative mind, but that's life, we live and we die, its just the facts of life. I am sad for his family, because they more then anyone, have to live with his loss, they're the ones that have to grief his death. I know that if I was related to him, or at least knew him-- and not just knew about him, I would probably be sad for him. But right now, my heart doesn't ache for him. Though it aches for his family, because they are the ones who have to move on after his death. I heard this interesting quote on a movie, and as far as I can remember it went like this, "Don't worry about those who have moved on to the other side, worry about those who they've left behind."

I watched some I love lucy episodes, when I couldn't get the television to work. I was afraid that the tv, would never work again, and I would have to rely on DVDs, that may or may not work. That is never fun. I wouldn't say that I'm addicted to television, but I can't stand the silence when it's turned off. Although, I have gotten into the habit of turning everything off, when I go to bed for the night. I used to keep the television on, when I went to bed, because I could watch the television from the comfort of my bed, I can still do that, but I choose not to. Yesterday, I got to bed at a half decent hour, I got to sleep at seven thirty in the evening, and woke up at three fifty in the morning. So that is good. it's good that my sleeping patterns are getting better. Today, I want to curl my hair, I haven't curled it in such a long time. I am hoping that my hair curler will actually heat up. Last time, it wouldn't heat up, and I like to beleive that it didn't heat up, because I didn't give it enough time to heat up and not because it's no longer capable of heating up. Last time my family came over, my mom, sent some books with them, and I still haven't gotten a chance to read those books yet. I plan on reading them soon. I honestly don't understand people who say, they don't want to go through the system, but then want to get in contact with a lawyer. Why do they think that a lawyer isn't going to follow the system! I will never understand thier logic. Anyway, the lawyers pretty much said what I've already found out. That came to no surprise to me. I was just thinking of something, but then it completely skipped my mind. I hate it when that happens. I am trying to find another way, that my husband and I can go to the united states together. I know one of the ways, and probably the only way, is to go on a vistors visa. I wish he could apply for the k3 visa, while I am here. I have found a website, that sends you all of the forms that you need to apply for Green Card, and helps you to prepare it and everything. I'll be sure to suggest it to my husband. Well if he thinks, he can live outside the united states for more then eighteen months, and still get his american passport, I would love to see him try. Because he just won't listen to me.

Right now I'm watching the Break up. I watched it yesterday, but I had it muted, because I was talking with my mom on the phone. and then I found something else more interesting to watch and thus I missed the ending. So now I'm watching it all the way through, because I want to see how it ends.

Dream, new look

This morning I decided to do something different, I put on eye shawdow. I usually, only cover my lashes with mascara, and then, sometimes I like to line my eyes with black kohl eyeliner. I don't do that so much. though I need to practice applying liquid liner. Sense I got a liquid eyeliner, a while ago, I've only used it a few times. And those few times, I had a difficult time with application. As they say practice makes perfect, or as close to perfect as I can get. I also put on some lipstick, I love the nieva lipstick, I have this really lovely pink color that I haven't used in a while, and so I thought that would be a lovely change. I used a brown and taupe eyeshadow palate. I also styled my hair in a different way, which I thought matched with my make up choice. I know, you all may be thinking, a light pink lipstick, and brown eyeshadow, but it looked really nice, and was more like a brown smoking eye, and I think brown and pink can go together, depending on the tones of each color. Anyway, I really liked the outcome. I have this dress that I really like, but I can't wear it yet, because I don't like how it looks on me. So I've got some pounds, inches I need to shred, before I will feel comfortable wearing that dress. The hardest thing for me to do these days, is find something to wear. Sometimes I literally feel like starving myself. But then I wonder what I would do with the rotting food. If I could go out and throw it myself, I wouldn't bother. But there's more to it then that. I know logically that if I starve I won't have the energy to workout. my body, will go into starvation mode, and I'll have to work extra hard, to burn what little calories I do take it, because, my body will turn it into fat. So I have got to be sensible about this whole thing. At this point in my life, I don't want to think about starting a child. Though, it's always in the back of my mind. And my dream of a few days ago didn't help matters either.

I am watching what I beleive to be the first episode of season seven of Smallville. I had forgotten that it comes on Mondays, and hence I wasn't thinking of watching it yesterday. Not that I could have watched it even if I had wanted to. Seeing how I was asleep at five and didn't wake up till two thirty this morning. Just a few days ago I was thinking about how much I missed watching Smallville. At first I didn't really like Smallville, it never really caught my attention. But during Ramadan, I really got into it, and I even prefered it over Arabic series. Speaking of Arabic series, it has been a really long time, sense I have watched an orginal arabic series. The only arabic series I've been following lately, are the dubbed arabic series. I don't mind if they are dubbed in any arabic, aside from the classical arabic. I did some reading yesterday. Steven Jobs and his team, spend around three hundred thousand dollars on one commerical, when he was into adversiting, or says the book that was written about him, it's intilted, "inside the mind of Steven Jobs." Seriously three hundred thousand dolls for one twenty second commerical! or it could have been shorter than that. But either way, that is a lot of money, aspecially when other companies were only paying 15,000 dollars to film thier commericals. But I guess if you have the money you might as well burn it right? Back to Smallville, when I first watched Smallville, I used to think that Lex Luthar, was a good guy, that he and Clark Kent, were friends. How stupid was I? Don't anwser that question. Watching it now, I don't even know why I thought that. Right now, there's a good Clark and a bad Clark. I wonder what's going to happen, when Good Clark finds out about bad Clark. I think Bad Clark will probably become best buddies with Lex Luther. Speaking of Lex Luther, he's going to confess to his wifes murder. Cloey died-----I don't think thats how you spell it, and maybe she's not really dead, like maybe her character will be coming back, though, I can't exactly be sure of that. Paris Hilton's British best friend. I don't like how Paris bought back Cat, after four eliminations. I wonder what she's playing at. Actually I shouldn't be too surprised, its clear, how sad she was when she had to leave for medical reasons, so it really shouldn't have come as a surprise to any of the people in the house, that Paris bought her back. And because she bought her back, she had to send two people home. I only remember one of the people, that british actress, I think Laury was her name. Because she didn't seem to know anything about Paris at all. And then this other girl, I forgot what her name is. Smallville update---Cloey is alive and well. I knew they wouldn't kill off her character. She's like the almost heart of the series. Back to Paris Hilton's British Best friend: I hate how everyone is so hard on that dancer girl, that one that was accuseed of faking an injury, why would someone do that? Anyway, it was good when her friend came to that faux court trial, and told everyone, that her behavior wasn't an act, that's she a genuinelly nice and kind person. As for Paris Hilton's best friend---the American version: I don't understand why she hasn't kicked Natasha out, she's got attitude, and thinks that, she's way better then Paris. I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with that. I'm just saying I think she's missing the whole point of being a friend. I think she wants to be Paris Hilton's compettior, and not her friend.

I was wrong, whatever season of One Tree Hill shows at one pm in the afternoon, hasn't finished yet. I watched it yesterday afternoon, and Paten, killed the one guy, who claimed to be her brother, and then broke into her house and tried to kill her, and later her ex friend, who had gotten worried about her, and gone to her house to check up on her, because she was supposed to meet Lucas at the prom. Speaking of Lucas, he is still trying to remember what happened with his mother's finance, I think he's trying to remember if his father killed him. I think its his father that killed his mom's finance. It's ironic how the leader of the clean teens, slept with Mouth, and then broke up with him right after. What a leader. I forgot what Mouths actual name is.

I want to prove to my husband that I don't need a nine to five job to be a good writer. Being a good writer has nothing to do with going out and working in some office building. Writing is about putting your thoughts on paper, in a organzied matter so that people can understand what you are talking about. Writing a good story, or a good article, is about writing what you know about. And you can learn a lot by watching television, and reading books. I beleive that the more you read, and the more you actually write, the better your writing gets. I don't believe that it has anything to do with working a full time job. I told my husband that I wanted to get a writing course. Because writing is what I want to do with my life. I don't know why I didn't think to get a degree in Creative Writing in the first place. Oh yeah, because I was thinking about a high class job as a paralegel, eventually a lawyer. But now that I don't even have a degree in that. I have educational information on the topic, I just don't have a degree. Anyway, my husband's reasoning for me not taking the writing course, is because he thinks I don't have enough life experience in order to suceed in a writing course. I need to write a full and complete story, I know I can do it, I just have to focus. I am already working on a story, so that is a good thing. I don't think you need to know everything you write about, especially if you are writing a fictional story. For example, did J,K rowling know how it felt like to fight he who shall not be named? Or how it felt to fly around on a broom stick, whilst chasing after a golden ball with wings? Did Steven King experience any of the things his character Carrie experience? Did his mother lock him up in the closet, and demand that he repent for his sins? Did he cause his high school to get back at those who had made his high school days a living hell? Did Robin Cook, pull out the heart of his dying sick daughter in a desperate measure to see what happened? Did Meg Cabbot, actually become a princess of a made up country?